In my book, When Work Hurts: Building Resilience When You’re Beat Up or Burnt Out, I describe three categories of work hurt: disappointment, disillusionment, and devastation. Like the AHEN model I shared in my previous post, this framework can also help us analyze our work hurt to understand what’s making us feel angry.
Three Types of Work Hurt
Disappointment happens when work fails to live up to our expectations. We expect our coworkers to clean their dishes in the breakroom, but they don’t. We expect our boss to communicate major changes in procedures with us, but she doesn’t.
Disillusionment happens when something at work challenges our deeply held assumptions about the way the world ought to be. We believe our coworker to be an exemplary collaborator, but he takes credit for our accomplishments. We assume our organization will treat all employees with dignity since one of the company’s core values is “people first,” but we discover they’re not paying essential workers a living wage.
Devastation happens when a work experience overwhelms us with grief. We’re unexpectedly laid off, we’re berated mercilessly by our manager, or we realize our company was responsible for a major environmental disaster.
The pain we experience as a result of our work hurt can vary, too. It can be acute or chronic. And it can be felt in our relationships with others, our relationship with God, our finances, and our careers. Thankfully, God has given us a way to pray when the pain of work is unbearable.
- DISAPPOINTMENT
- DISILLUSIONMENT
- DEVASTATION
A Prayer for When Work Hurts
A lament is a prayer of pain and a prayer of promise. In the Bible, we learn that God’s people used this type of prayer to tell God how difficult their circumstances were and how debilitating their emotional, physical, and relational pain was. They cried out to God to look, hear, and remember them. They also set their hearts on their hope in God’s redemptive work.
Here’s a simple outline for a prayer of lament.
BE REAL
Tell God about the disappointment, disillusionment, or devastation you’ve experienced at work. Describe your pain and the fallout.
BE BOLD
Ask God for help. Be specific about what you need.
BELIEVE
Declare one or more reasons you have confidence in God.
Here’s a template for a prayer of lament you can use when work hurts.
BE REAL
Dear God, I want to talk with you about what happened/is happening at work.
[Describe the disappointment, disillusionment, or devastation.]
This makes me feel [emotion(s)]. It’s causing [consequences or fallout].
BE BOLD
I need you to [action] because [reason].
BELIEVE
I believe you are a God who [action or description of God’s character]. I have confidence in this because [reason(s) for your confidence].
In Jesus’ name I pray.
Amen.
The next time you’re feeling angry at work, pause for a few minutes to investigate your anger. Is it due to disappointment, disillusionment, or devastation? Pull out this template and say a prayer of lament about your work hurt. And trust that God will meet you in it.
